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--- Profile Fara Shazreen  Create Your Badge Tagboard ----
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Back from night study......... Wasn't as effective as the previous weeks'. Had oral practice with ms lim. I hereby conclude that i cannot do oral with her as the invigilator. It's either i laugh like hell, or i try to be so serious till i tense up, like just now. So stupid la, fara. Zzzz. Don't know what i was blabbering about, throughout the whole thing. Gaahhh. I don't know why, but i can't be confident in front of her! And i'd start speaking in singlish. Zz. Anyway, cos4A+cos2A = 2cos3AcosA -.- Trigo, trigo, trigo. So fun. What was i doing last year??? Lastly, i wish to state that i do not need you. I'll live. OMG, i can't believe i did that -.- Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. 'Halo' people. I must have been too... no. drunk 0.0 Siao eh. Been awake since 2am. Doing work :) Still on chapter7. It's slow progress uh, but i'll get it done! Am behind like 2chapters, according to my schedule. That sucks. Anyway, the trip to the anatomy museum was fine, i guess. Very interesting, you know, on account that the specimens were once alive. Not too gross la. But, kind of poor thing, especially the fetus, with one eye. Scary, but sad uh. Sieyuan was like, patting the jar and said, "Hai, it's a good thing that you(the fetus)'re in here(the jar) and not alive." Saddddddddddddd. But yeah, good experience. Oh man. Just remembered that i'll be having night study later on. I'm tempted to go back to sleep, upon thinking of the long 19hours waiting for me... Gahh. I think i'm going to take a short nap. Today's going to be a long day. Hahha, old buddy :) It's been great, i mean the day. Yeah, not too hectic. I managed to cover up to chapter 6 of add.math. Currently on chapter 7. A little behind schedule though. Would probably take a few hours to finish it :) And then, back to bio. Companion cells... Sheesh. Oh yeah, will be visiting the anatomy museum tmr. From what i read about it so far, i think it'd be interesting. So, kind of looking forward to it actually. Hahh, by the way, ms tay has created a SS course on litespeed. Do login for revision yeah. "Revisionis very important." Hahahaha. Ever so funny man. Hah. Oh, before i forget, was pissed with someone in class today. The attitude totally turned me off uh. TMD. Act big. You talk. You make your opinions known. BUT YOU WON'T LISTEN, WILL YOU!? Damn. I was SO close to rebutting. Thank god i didn't. Hah. Sit further away from me la next time. I really can't stand you. ZZZZZZZ. Enough of the complaining. Hahaha, back to old buddy. I AM SHY OKAY. (: ha. Let me take a few miutes off to type something here... Haven't been the best few days. Had nightmares of all sorts and lousy feeling lingered. Try as i might, they just won't go away. Thank god i'm feelig much better now. Think the rain must've washed away the bad feelings bah. Hah. At ease. Really am at ease. For now, there's really nothing bothering me, apart from the thought of prelims, which is just 14days away, mind you. Got to give it 70% of what i've got. Hopefully 100% for Os. I've thought about what i want in life. And as i remember, my childhood dreams aren't too different from the things i hope to achieve. Yeah, mdm eio said something today, about being the best in everything that you want to do... Now i know why people were so skeptical about my priorities half a year ago. Didn't ever thought of it the way i should have, but nah, i made a mistake. I guess, making amends is what people would do. As for me, i don't wish to stop at that. I want to make a change. For once, in my life. Crazy people on facebook. They, who shall not be named -.- Hmm. I don't know if it's going to be a good thing; allowing people to know me better. I guess i am too used to not disclosing much about my personal life, to anyone. P.S: It's not that i don't trust you. It's just that, hai. I don't know if i can ever be true to you, when i can't even be true to myself. Heh. Finally sitting down after a nice cooling bath. Had night study just now till 9pm. It was another great session. Today's special was ice-cream cake from swensens. Birthday cake for jessica and jovine. Ms azaaaaaaa. We had ice-cream from island creamery two weeks ago. Omg, night study is fattening -.- Hai, i guess, i've gotten over it. Well, pretty much. Am really happy for xinni and dionne. Really. Their my teammates and no matter how much we used to quarrel and talk behind each other's back, i still love and care for them. Here's wishing you two all the best! Hmm. Come to think of it, i have never liked the idea of having a fixed plan. So, even IF i have gotten any contract through dsa, i'd probably still have forms of regret? Somehow. Okay, i kow i sound like i'm merely comforting myself. In life, things just happen. But there's sure to be a reason behind each occurrence. So, yeah, i should accpet things and move on, right? Had some appreciation ceremony after school today, and boy was it a total crap. Except for the food of course. Shan't elaborate on how kiasu, or rather, inconsiderate were we during the reception. hah. Fond memories~ Saw thomaslee in the sportshall, and again, he said i looked pale, like before. Hah. Is it really? Hmm. Truth is, i've never worked this hard before. To achieve something i really want, this feeling is real. Hah. Am really tired now. I guess i'll take a nap. If, and only if, i manage to wake up early tmr, i'll do some work. Oh yeah, before i forget, lingying and i went crazy over this shuai pt coach. HAHA. Okay la, to be honest, she was crazy over him. I was only humouring her -.- hahah. Alright. I guess school's starting in 9more hours or so. Yay. I can't help it. I just can't. It's Wednesday night and there's still school tmr. Plus the night study that i've yet prepare for. Tonight's really negative. Negative. Negative. Negative. It's frustrating. It's tiring to be constantly thinking positive when you know things aren't how you want them to be. And you say i'm happy. Now, spewing vulgarities doesn't help even the least bit. The heart is beating hard, and it won't stop tonight. Am feeling terrible now :( And what's up with blogger? -.- Hai, just wish that my phone would ring now... cos it haven't been vibrating even, since morning and that's sad. And yeah, i'm an idiot cos i waited for a mail that never came. Another sad case. Because of the current foul mood, i don't even feel like revising, cause the info would just seep through. My mind's in a whirl. It's a sieve, for now. Damn it. I just need to get myself to move on. Hmm. Experienced a deep, deep sleep approx. 2hours ago. It felt like i could go on sleeping forever.. The last time i never wanted to wake up was years ago, and now i'm going through it again. It's sad, damn sad. You know, sometimes, right at this juncture, i wished a kind soul with high EQ would come and save me. And tonight, i know i won't fall deep asleep again... Insomnia. Damn terrible feeling. Hai, dejection. The last time i ever fell this great was when i first failed a maths test in sec2 :( It hit me hard. So hard. I know i won't wake up feeling good for three days at least.... And to think i convinced myself that i was a setter. Truth is, i'm not fit to be one. So long, all the sacrifices. I'm home! Alone. Again. This is sickening. Grr. Had ss early in the morning :) Saw ms tay again, for the second time this week. And for the third, tmr. Oh, got the timetable for prelims already. The first paper's going to be after national day. Yeah, right after. Damn, i'm being upset now. I don't understand one thing though. Why would feel so dejected when i don't even care? This is stupid. I'm wasting time and feelings thinking about the possibilty of me _______ . When i know, ultimately, i would just reject it in the end. Hmm, maybe i just like flattery~ Gah. I shouldn't be here. OMG, super damn high now la! Hahha. Okay, at first it was freaky, then it was funny, then it was gayyyyyyyyyyyy~! Made me laugh like hell sia this woman! Weekend blues :( Okay, so far, haven't done much. EW- almost complete. The corrections for essay is done :) I the midst of covering chapter 8 (very long) of bio text. Am feeling rather tired man. Woke up at 8 this morning. That's considered very late la, plus the fact that i totally didn't hear my 3.30am alarm. Super frustrated. Hmmm. Yay school tmr :) Labels: blues~ I'm tired to the max! Hai, and today wasn't exactly a good day for me :( Was gloomy and grumpy and sulky the whole day like some bitch. But it wasn't stress that got into my head okay! Zzzzzz. If it was, i would be like totally hyped. Not so gloomy. Renxian was like, "Eh pms is it?" -.- He's a guy, mind you. The world has become so open-minded man. Oh yeah, by the way, it's his birthday today. Happy birthday! Thanks for sharing the gummiessss. Hah. Damn bloody freaking tired. Really really really........ Oh yeah, yesterday's trial at hwachong. WAS. screwed. Haha! I thought i did better the first round. But yeah, doesn't matter :) I'm not expecting anything out of it. Had fun. After years of not exercising, i finally got up and played the sport i like. It was fun man, seriously. Laughed at funny crappy stuff. But a bit paiseh, cos at some point, when my side scored i was like, "Yeah!" - thinking that i was in BP! Zzzzzz. Then i turned and looked at cassandra with that O.O face. Hahah. And she was funny la. Kept entertaining me with her comments~ At the end of it, sat for debrief. Okay la, wasn't exactly a debrief like DEBRIEF. Hah. Mr tan went to ask questions like, "How many points do you think you'd get?" and "Are you in express or NA stream?" I hate the second question-.- Being the first to be asked, i was like, "Err, no no. Special?" Everyone was like ------- (speechless) -.- Haha. SO paiseh. So yeah, trials ended at 7.45pm. Reached home at about 8.20. Wanted to do some work by i k.o.ed before 10. Zzzzzzz. Hah. I love my life.
And you! I will see you on fri! I need to get a freaking watch. For now, i really want nothing else except for constant drive. Wow, hwachong actually invited me for second try-outs. Hah, thought mine was a confirmed-gone-case. Oh well. Though my chances are really that little, i've decided to go, for the fun of it, even though i have not touched the ball for eons! But i still have a feeling that i got the message by mistake? Cos it seemed impossible -.- And great. Now, i have lost my touch, lost 67% of my ball sense, and probably gained 25% of newly-deposited FATS. Die. Hahah, but hey, just going to give it my best shot. I mean, it is really against my principle to leave behind a bad impression :) So yeah, whatever happens, happens.
So basically, i have already laid down my plans for the future. I'm all set. Now, bring me that 90% that i can't control. Time and again, we the humans, have made mistakes in life. But humans are we. We make mistakes. And find wisdom in every one. Through it all my friend, when you're done dwelling on the time you've wasted and lost as a result, Now, are you game for another round? -farashazreen Hmmm, it's raining. Cooling weather, i like :) Well, today has been rather productive. Been doing a.math since morning. But i still think that the rate of me answering each question is way too slow :( Must improve. Anyway, i'm surprised that i managed to wake up at 8plus even though i went to bed at 5am this morning. Was having stomach/abdominal pain or rather, discomfort, since 6pm yesterday. I think i must have swallowed in too much air -.- Causing all the belching and whatnot. I thought i was going to die. Haha, but, yeah, i pulled through. And thanks jovine for making me complete that 45-question quiz. It distracted me for awhile. I'm not being sarcastic. No. Great. I'm finally preparing essays for ss. yay me. Going to fix dates for consultation. I'm going to trouble the teachers already. yay. Okay, later. "She knows what she wants and she's willing to work hard to get it." Sometimes, in order to attain some things, you ruined everything else. I read a very good article. Hmm. First of July. School was good, but there wasn't anything special about today since every day's as equally good. Then again, i think there's something wrong with my health. Been having this tight feeling in my chest. Yes, there is something wrong with me. Hope it'll be gone by tomorrow. |
