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--- Profile Fara Shazreen  Create Your Badge Tagboard ----
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I skipped school today, cos i felt feverish in the morning. Well, actually, i needed time to complete my PI, which is totally not gonna make it. I'm doing things half-heartedly, and i hate the outcome of things now. Nothing i do was as great as the last time. I feel like a loser now wth. And i know i shouldn't be thinking too much.... But i just can't help it. I'm really lagging behind the rest. Suddenly, i feel so helpless about everything. Yesterday, during PE, i ran 1.6km. I felt so xinku, and i didn't know why my back felt like it's strained. I couldn't make big strides, and i was the last to run in. Finally after my rounds, i sat at the corner, clutching my back like in pain. I excused myself to the toilet, and i couldn'tstop my tears. I cried a river. But i knew it wasn't so much due to the back pain. It was helplessness that pulled me to the ground. I felt terrible. In the evening, i went to work. The pain had subsided, but part of it still lingered. I felt so restricted suddenly, and i began thinking, "What do i really want?" I know i will not give up on anything right now, apart from studies which i'm losing grip of. But i know it's time i gave up something else, because i want to complete my JC course within two years. Not three, not more. Only two years. It wasn't until yesterday that i realised i was pushing myself too hard for the unpurposeful. Though i can't bear to leave them in the lurch. I've come so far. Yet, there's something bigger to accomplish. They say, "If you want to get hold of something big, you have to first let go of the small things in your grip." Perhaps, i should start thinking sensibly. Yeah man! I'm all ready for school..! (Okay, maybe not. Some tutorials 're undone!) Hmmmmm. Kind of learned my lesson yesterday, was nearly nearly nearly late for school. Imagine me still at Buona Vista MRT at 7.20am! Darn. Was perparing myself mentally for dc tmr then (which is today). But still, i hang onto the last 'strand' of hope that i could, somehow, get there in time. Ran like some mad ass. Miraculously, i reached. WITHIN 6min! how about that! Damn heng laa. But shit, i was sweating like crap. ehhhh, WHO CARES RIGHT?? I wasn't late! ;) So today, can't take the chance. Working later so can't afford to go for dc, which ends at 6pm!
Yay. Today's timetable will follow friday's! End at 1.50! Yayyyyyyy. Hope i wo't be late for work!
PS: Dzul got a chance to serve FELICIA CHIN!!! DAMN. Why can't she come tonight insteaddddddd :( awwwwwww. Missed the chance! Eeeyerh, dzul!!!!!!!!
Alrighty, got to go! |
